If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
