that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
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Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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