It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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