Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
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One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
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So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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