I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
