He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand