Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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