I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
