I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
