Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
