summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
