I skipped work to stalk him.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
