So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Buhtt sex?
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
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