some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize