I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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