I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
You left your phone here
Wait...
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
