i permit you to call me
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
