Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
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