she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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