so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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