we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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