We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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