So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
