I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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