so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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