are you still at the devil's house?
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
