If that was your dad, he is hot
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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