dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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