You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
