I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
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