I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
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