thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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