I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize