you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
