I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.