I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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