didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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