When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
