Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
