Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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