You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
