Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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