dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
