My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
