It's like God shit irony all over that family
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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