i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
