i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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