you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
