If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
