Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
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i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
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I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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