Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize