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We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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